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habits to chuck

here are six habits you should nix early in your career to ensure you aren’t being counterproductive in your pursuit of success: 1. Not taking your lunch break You want to show your manager you understand meeting deadlines is crucial, and sometimes it means skipping your lunch to get that report done by noon—but every day shouldn’t look like this. On days you don’t have tight deadlines, take a break to replenish your mind and body. The company isn’t going to plummet in stock if you take 30 minutes to eat your sub sandwich. Eat your lunch and enjoy every bite. Take some time to step away from your desk, go chat up another coworker and enjoy the break. 2. Answering emails after hours Your personal time is just that—personal. It’s your time to spend doing what you love to do, whether that’s hiking or lounging by the pool playing Candy Crush. And what you love to do probably doesn’t include monitoring your work email like your life depends on it. Relax. Work-life balance is a must. There are times when you’ll need to be on-call for a project that’s extended itself after hours. Other than those times, toss your work phone aside and make a point not to look at it until the next business day. Your boss emailing you pictures of her vacation to Mykonos doesn’t warrant an immediate reply. 3. Not using your paid time off One of the best parts of the benefits package is the vacation time! But what’s fun about it if you never use what you’ve earned? You can and you should use your vacation time. All of it. The constant workload will often make you feel there will never be a perfect time to break away and go surfing in Maui, but the truth is there’s never a perfect time to do anything in life. The work will always be there. Set aside some time with your manager early on to discuss your vacation plans and all the projects that need to be completed before your trip. Simple. 4. Over-explaining yourself You need to go to the doctor because you’ve been experiencing an annoying pain in your leg. Does your manager need to know why you have to leave early to go to the doctor? Absolutely not. Sometimes we over-explain our situation to our employers to prove why we need the time off. A 12-minute synopsis is unnecessary. Things that happen in your personal life are your business. Providing a doctor’s note is the best way to show you’re being honest. 5. Not speaking up in meetings Maybe you’re the newbie at the company or you just got promoted to a new division, but it’s not an excuse for not speaking up at every opportunity when you’re invited to a meeting. Never underestimate the importance of what you have to contribute. Your creative idea could help launch a viral social media campaign. More often than not, someone else will say the exact thing you were terrified to say, and everyone will end up loving the idea. Don’t let this happen; own your ideas and speak confidently about them. 6. Taking on more work than you can handle You’re only one person. You can’t do all the work by yourself. You shouldn’t have to, either. Sure, you want to impress your manager and other colleagues by showing them you know how to work efficiently and can handle your workload, but never compromise the quality of your work because you have too many other tasks to complete. It’s okay to speak up and let your manager know when you’ve reached your capacity on the tasks you’ve been assigned. Speaking up, expressing concern about your workload and prioritizing your tasks will make you look responsible rather than incompetent.

how to be work better

■TRACK CONTEXT – Spend time noticing what’s happening around you and spotting the critical moments that could lead to something important. Scanning both the internal and external environments to understand trends and relevant events. ■SET GOALS – Take steps to define priorities and select goals that are supported by the context and aligned with the vision. Goals are created independently and collaboratively and they are always connected to a desired outcome. ■CLOSE GAPS – Intentionally manage the gaps as barriers emerge, context shifts, and alignment and shared commitment to goals waive

be brazen

Step 1) Getting Crystal Clear First order of business is clarity. What is keeping you trapped? What do you really want? We will examine the truth about where you and where you want to be. So you can begin closing the gap with purpose and direction. Step 2) GETTING RE-ACQUAINTED WITH YOU And the magic begins! In step two we start to uncover your strengths (you won’t believe they have been hiding in plain sight all these years!) so you can start to build your biz or project around them. Step 3) GETTING A SENSE OF DIRECTION I bet you didn’t realize you already have all the answers? You just don’t know how to access them…yet. This step is about self coaching, the key techniques that will keep you connected to your truth, 24/7. Step 4) GETTING BRAVE Fear is not the enemy. All successful women on a mission know this. It’s what we do about fear that sets us apart. In step four you’ll uncover the resources you need to start playing big, taking risks and making the impact you need to create results. Step 5) GETTING PERSISTENT Humans are like bicycles. You need forward momentum or else you fall down. In this step, I show you what to do when you feel stuck so you can keep moving towards your best life. Step 6) GETTING PLAYFUL None of this would be worth doing if it weren’t any fun. Play is great for it’s own sake but it is also the key to innovation, creativity, self-discovery and growth – and kick ass problem solving! In this step we make sure play is a primary part of your life as you move forward with clarity, purpose and direction towards your dreams!

3 things in a man

I. Protector Men must be capable of protecting their women. It is often said that men are territorial. It is not only a widely accepted generalization but an encouraged one. So does it mean that all men should have the strength or the will to fight for anything worth a skirmish? Well, all men must priest They may seem a bit of a loser, but they are indeed wise beyond their own age. It all makes sense when women actually starts asking, "is that man capable of becoming a wise father to guide my children?" good provider is someone who have a decent high-paying job, simply having enough money to take his girlfriend on a vacation to Hongkong or Paris. It matters most where and how he gets his money, not just how much he gets for it.

how to prevent panic attacks

. Walk around with a big water bottle I love this because it’s cheap and easy. The next time you’re worried that you might be on the verge of having a panic attack, drink a full bottle of water (or TWO full glasses of water) – one gulp every three seconds. This is a great way to slow down and normalize the pace of your breath, which will naturally calm down your heart. 2. Cut down on stimulants A lot of people I’ve talked to who have panic attacks are either consuming too much caffeine (1 cup per day is enough to push you over the edge), too much aspartame (diet soda = poison), or smoking marijuana regularly (weed can crank anxiety up to 11). And of course, they overlook these facts and wonder why their body is freaking out. When your body starts tweaking out, that’s its way of signaling that something is wrong and you need to SLOW DOWN. I love coffee, but I had to cut it out of my system. I was drinking 3-5 cups per day, and wondered why I felt so awful. Within one week of removing caffeine from my system, my hands stop shaking. I stopped feeling jittery. I calmed the hell down. Now, I only have a maximum of one HALF cup of coffee (I pour the other half out), or I just drink water. Take stock of what’s going into your bloodstream every day. Are you consuming caffeine? Aspartame? Marijuana? Other drugs? If your body is freaking out, that means something is wrong. Kick that stimulant out of your system for a week. Assess how you feel at the end of the week, and then reintroduce the substance by taking a normal dose you’re used to taking. If those panicky feelings return with 1-2 hours, you’ve found the culprit. Limit or eliminate that substance as much as you can. 3. Daily PLAY As my mentor Tim Ferriss told me, “Getting daily exercise is 80% of the battle” for reducing your anxiety. And I agree. The problem is that most people associate “exercise” with “chore” or “punishment.” But it doesn’t have to be that way. Exercise can and should be fun! Set aside just 20 minutes each day to move around and get your heart pumping. I like running around outside while playing a game with a friend (I love playing catch with the Aerobie flying ring – it’s a fun, social toy that naturally forces you to exercise). If you can’t do that, go lift heavy weights at the gym for just 20 minutes (three sets of 8 reps -- deadlift, squat, or kettlebell). Just do SOMETHING each day to get your body moving and your heart pumping. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to look good. You just need to MOVE and have fun for 20 minutes (just 1.2% of your day!) 4. Get better sleep If I had to recommend just ONE change that will improve the quality of your sleep (apart from daily play and eliminating caffeine), it would be this: Stop looking at screens past 9:00pm -- NO EXCEPTIONS. Seriously, the internet will still be around tomorrow. I know the temptation to be connected 24 hour a day is strong, but don’t you truly want to overcome your anxiety? Well, it requires some sacrifice. That means NO MORE SCREENS OR BRIGHT LIGHTS AFTER 9:00PM. I use the Commit app ($2.99) to remind me, every night, to stop looking at screens. It works. Don’t worry -- you’re not going to miss anything important. No calls, no text messages, no emails are going to come through after 9:00pm that will change your life. Plus the light on your screen is just going to wake your right back up again if you check it at night. Value the good night’s sleep more than being connected. Make the choice to take care of yourself. 5. Vitamin-B and fish oil People who are super stressed out (i.e. people who have panic attacks) have vital nutrients in their brains that are being rapidly depleted. That’s what happens when we’re stressed – we drain our body’s resouces. Fortunately, you can replenish your brain within a few weeks by taking a Vitamin-B complex pill (I prefer TwinLab) and a few servings of fish oil (I like Coromega squeeze packets) every day. It only costs like $2 per day to take this stuff, and you can buy them at Whole Foods or on Amazon. Just remember: It takes a week or two to feel the effects, so stick with it. Trust me, your brain will thank you. 6. Mock your worries This one is kind of tough, but 100% worth practicing… Ever notice how much you resist your “bad” thoughts? How much you want them to change into perfect silence, or perfect peacefulness? It’s your RESISTANCE to your own thoughts that’s making your mind seem like such a scary place. You’re trying to run away from yourself, instead of leaning in and playing around with your thoughts! It might be hard to remember this sometimes, but it’s just YOU up there. And even though you’re scared of bad things happening (going crazy, death, “the end is near”), the fact is that those bad things ARE NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT NOW. They are just a string of words and images swimming around in your mind. And you don’t have to take them so seriously. How you respond to your own mind is a choice.... Your thoughts aren’t “good” or “bad”; they’re just thoughts. You don’t need to resist them or make them perfect, or even assign them any value. You can treat them with detached indifference. They are background noise – a petulant child that’s screaming and trying to distract you. And instead of frantically trying to get the child to shut up and leave you alone, you can choose to PLAY WITH IT. This might seem crazy, but it worked for me...

execercise

Close your eyes. Call up the face of someone still alive who years ago did something or said something that changed your life for the better. Someone who you never properly thanked; someone you could meet face-to-face next week. Got a face? Gratitude can make your life happier and more satisfying. When we feel gratitude, we benefit from the pleasant memory of a positive event in our life. Also, when we express our gratitude to others, we strengthen our relationship with them. But sometimes our thank you is said so casually or quickly that it is nearly meaningless. In this exercise … you will have the opportunity to experience what it is like to express your gratitude in a thoughtful, purposeful manner. Your task is to write a letter of gratitude to this individual and deliver it in person. The letter should be concrete and about three hundred words: be specific about what she did for you and how it affected your life. Let her know what you are doing now, and mention how you often remember what she did. Make it sing! Once you have written the testimonial, call the person and tell her you'd like to visit her, but be vague about the purpose of the meeting; this exercise is much more fun when it is a surprise. When you meet her, take your time reading your letter. This somewhat self-consciousness-inducing exercise, Seligman promises, will make you happier and less depressed a mere month from now. He then suggests a complementary second practice – the "What-Went-Well Exercise," also known as "Three Blessings" – based on the interventions he and his team at the Positive Psychology Center and the University of Pennsylvania have validated in the random-assignment, placebo-controlled experiments they have been conducting since 2001 to study changes in life-satisfaction and depression levels. He contextualizes the value of this exercise amidst our worry-culture and age of anxiety: We think too much about what goes wrong and not enough about what goes right in our lives. Of course, sometimes it makes sense to analyze bad events so that we can learn from them and avoid them in the future. However, people tend to spend more time thinking about what is bad in life than is helpful. Worse, this focus on negative events sets us up for anxiety and depression. One way to keep this from happening is to get better at thinking about and savoring what went well. For sound evolutionary reasons, most of us are not nearly as good at dwelling on good events as we are at analyzing bad events. Those of our ancestors who spent a lot of time basking in the sunshine of good events, when they should have been preparing for disaster, did not survive the Ice Age. So to overcome our brains' natural catastrophic bent, we need to work on and practice this skill of thinking about what went well. He then offers his empirically tested antidote: Every night for the next week, set aside ten minutes before you go to sleep. Write down three things that went well today and why they went well. You may use a journal or your computer to write about the events, but it is important that you have a physical record of what you wrote. The three things need not be earthshaking in importance ("My husband picked up my favorite ice cream for dessert on the way home from work today"), but they can be important ("My sister just gave birth to a healthy baby boy"). Next to each positive event, answer the question "Why did this happen?" For example, if you wrote that your husband picked up ice cream, write "because my husband is really thoughtful sometimes" or "because I remembered to call him from work and remind him to stop by the grocery store." Or if you wrote, "My sister just gave birth to a healthy baby boy," you might pick as the cause ... "She did everything right during her pregnancy." Writing about why the positive events in your life happened may seem awkward at first, but please stick with it for one week. It will get easier. For those of us able to quiet our inner culturally-conditioned cynic who judges and dismisses such practices, Seligman promises that we'll be "less depressed, happier, and addicted to this exercise six months from now."

1) TIME: What do you really want to do with your time? Look at your plans for today, this week, this month, this year? Does the way you’re spending your time fit with your longterm goals and dreams in your life? Unless you start tweaking your schedule, bit by bit, to honour those things that REALLY matter, you won’t be able to create the life of your dreams. 2) RELATIONSHIPS: Who do you really want to spend time with, who really adds to your life? We’re creatures of habit, often we spend time with the same people simply because that’s what we’ve always done. The people around you mold you into what you’re becoming, right now. If you’re spending time with someone, think about it – would you want to become more like them, or not? If not, be conscious of the amount of precious time you spend with that person, and also look for some people to spend time with, who are closer to who you would like to be one day. 3) ACTIVITIES: What do you want to do more of? 4) What do you want to do less of? Make a list of each of these two categories. Now, look at your schedule for the week or month, and see what you could delete and add, based on your answers to these two questions. 5) HEALTH: What’s the one big health change you could make that would make the most difference to your quality of life? Once you’ve decided what that is, what is a way that you could start to make this change, in a way that would be enjoyable and realistic for you? Dramatic changes that require a lot of sacrifice or pain generally won’t work. 6) SELF-IMAGE AND CONCEPT: Who do you want to become in the next year? 7) What do you want to change about yourself the most? Imagine yourself 12 months from now – who would you like to be? More importantly, what steps would you have to take between now and then, to become that new you? Would you need to take a course, take a risk, take a trip…what do you need to do? 8) PURPOSE: If you could choose to get one thing out of this year, what would it be? How do you feel when you wake up in the morning? Are you enthusiastic about your days? I used to have to drag myself out of bed, when I was “off-purpose”, doing things that didn't fit with my personality, sense of meaning, or best skills and passions. Now that I’ve found my purpose, which is inspiring and helping others to live happier, healthier more fulfilling lives, I love my work so much that I have to force myself to get enough sleep and stop and eat and play! 9) VALUES AND PRIORITIES: If you suddenly found out this was the last year of your life, what would you do? (Besides racking up your credit card - BTW that is not an appropriate answer!) Who would you spend time with? What would you spend your time doing? Begin to incorporate these very things, into your life now, if you want to live a life without regrets. 10) VALUES & PRIORITIES: What have you been putting off for “Someday” that you could do, instead, this year? Or this week? The next time you hear yourself saying “yes, we should really do that,” or “I’d love to do that, someday”, find a way NOW to start doing it, even in the smallest of ways. Don’t say to a friend that you must get together more and then forget about it – plan that lunch now, even if it’ll be months from now.

How? A) Relax your mind. Breathe deeply. Enter a meditative state. B) Dare to think about your most painful incidents. C) Force yourself to answer the following: What is a positive and/or lucky way to learn from the past and thereby attain some gain in my pain? List five positive lessons—so you can start to forgive your past—and move forward in a more positive direction. After you get done blaming your past for present pain, you must also accept some responsibility. After all, you’ve been an adult (or adult-ish) (and maybe even just plain ol’ doltish) for a while now. Although your troublemaking subconscious has gotten you into some painful relationships and challenging situations, the time has come for you to show your cerebrum who’s boss and stop allowing those painful misadventures. How? A) Next time you’re tempted to settle for a pattern of pain, repeat the following mantra: “I am not my past behavior. I am not my past failures. I am not how others have at one time treated me. I am only who I think I am right now in this moment. I am only what I do right now in this moment.” B) Find examples of consistently happy, loving couples, and truly happy people. Spend as much time as possible with them so you can start to shift your belief system to what “normal love” and “normal happiness” are. Over time, you will begin to view highly positive situations as examples for your new normal. The more you witness positive examples of love and joy, the more opportunity you will have to change your belief system about life—and thereby start to change your “masochistic equilibrium.” C) Talk with any family members you feel that you can be open with about this concept. You’ll find that the more you can be honest about repressed feelings and share them, the less troublemaking your subconscious will need to be. D) Recognize that you have triggers that remind you of past pain and might thereby create a downward spiral of negative thinking and behavior. Clear your life of these depressing triggers. For example, you might want to remove items from your home that your ex-spouse has given you. Instead, get “trigger happy” and focus on positive triggers that remind you of all your happy relationships. For example, you might want to put up photos in your home that represent happy times, happy people, or happy philosophies you want to live by. E) Finally, there’s an added sneaky reason why painful patterns form: a theory à la Carl Jung. He believed that our lives need meaning and purpose. If we don’t have meaning and purpose, we acquire a bad habit in order to create drama and excitement—so we feel like there’s something interesting and entertaining happening in our life—even if it’s a bad exciting thing. Jung’s name for these patterns of “enterpaining” situations was “low-level spiritual quests.”

The Secret of Getting things done is....Action! Action! Action! Learning does not stop at the schoolhouse door or at graduation. Lifelong learning is the only vehicle to positive growth & change that is available. Each day is a new beginning and a new opportunity to create the person we desire to become. Remember, life isn't finished with us until we are finished with life. You need to condition your mind with positive attitude towards success. Have an idea, create a plan for its achievement, and work the plan. THOUGHTS + ACTIONS = SUCCESS Do you have a plan, Pradipisking ? Have you written it down ? Do you read it several times daily. Are you conditioning your subconscious mind to open the door when opportunity knocks. ? Be continuously aware that we think about what we become. Thinks about success. Think about opportunities. Think about positive responses to negative world conditions. Position yourself for greatness and then make it so! We truly are the creators of our future. Why not create a positive one? Your assignment Pradipisking ,is to write down your plan, read it daily until it crystallizes in your subconscious mind, and simultaneously act on the plan however you are able. Dig into your plan deeper & deeper and before you know it , you will be living the life you like.

Marianne Williamson said, "Love is what we were born with, fear is what we learned here." Consider where you learned some of your fears: was it from your family of origin, your religious institutions, or maybe a past trauma? Avoiding fear only perpetuates it, but one thing that can help is to allow fear to arise in a different way. In the "Befriend Your Fear" chapter of The Now Effect I suggest a simple practice: "Breathing in, I feel the fear, breathing out, I hold it with a heart of compassion."

) SLEEP. Kyle didn't have a sleep routine. He stayed up late and went to bed at random hours each night, checking his laptop and cell phone while he was laying in bed. He also occasionally drank coffee and energy drinks late in the day, which gave him a boost of caffeine that remained in his bloodstream for several hours. My recommendations: Set a daily reminder on your phone to GET READY FOR BED at the same time every night (say, 9:30pm). Drop whatever you're doing, brush your teeth, change out of your clothes, then get in bed. Don't stare at bright lights (i.e. screens) for at least one hour before going to bed. Plug your cell phone charger far away from your bedroom, so you can't be tempted to check it while lying in bed. Download the Flux app (justgetflux.com) to have your computer screen automatically turn off the blue light in the monitor and switch over to an amber hue in the evening. Cover up all the windows in your room. Make your room as pitch black as possible (cover up any source of light, including digital clocks and the light on fire alarms) and lower the temperature (68 degrees is ideal). Finally, take a 20-minute nap after lunch, laying on your back and covering your eyes with a pillow (I do this every single day). Don't TRY to fall asleep; just observe the rhythm of your breathing so you can relax. Avoid alcohol during the week (it disrupts your sleep if you drink within 4 hours of going to bed) and DON'T drink caffeine past 4pm. 2) DIET. Kyle is mostly vegetarian and believes he's eating healthy. He mostly eats fruit, vegetables, tofu, and sandwiches. He drinks water, Diet Coke, and coffee. He rarely eats meat, avoids food with tons of sugar, and limits his drinking to a few beers on the weekends. But there are a number of problems with his diet: (1) He's consuming toxic and unnatural substances every day -- specifically food and drinks that contain gluten, which tears up the intestines and drastically lowers energy levels, and drinks with caffeine and aspartame, which fuel his anxiety. (2) He is completely deprived of healthy sources of FAT (critical to keeping the brain functioning properly), and vital nutrients that can only be obtained by ingesting animal sources. My recommendations: Don't eat or drink anything with wheat / gluten for six weeks (no bread, pasta, pizza, beer, ketchup, mustard, soy sauce, BBQ sauce, processed meats). Check the label for the words "wheat" and "gluten" before you eat anything (when I went 40 days without gluten, my energy and happiness went through the roof). Here's how I eat during each meal now- I have one "happy" meat source (cage-free eggs, grass-fed beef, etc.), eat a ton of one type of vegetable, and have a handful of a healthy side (like blueberries or almonds). I also aim to eat a lot of fat at lunch and dinner by cooking with Kerrygold butter or coconut oil. I only drink water, coconut water, or tea (no milk-based drinks, sodas, and limited caffeine). If you want, you can cheat for one day of the week with wine, hard alcohol, chocolate, etc. Just don't have wheat or anything with gluten for six weeks. It's a challenge, but it's totally worth it. 3) FIXING NUTRIENT DEFICIENCIES. I can almost guarantee Kyle is deficient in vitamin B-12, which can only be obtained through meat or supplements. B-12 is extremely important, because if you don't have enough, your anxiety is amplified and your brain ages twice as fast (yikes). When I got my micronutrient test, I discovered I was massively deficient in B-12, even though I was eating meat regularly! Once I started supplementing, I felt less anxious and less fatigued within one week. Kyle might be deficient in a few other key nutrients, which are rapidly depleted when a person's mind and body go through extended periods of stress. My recommendations: If you can afford it, get a micronutrient deficiency test through your doctor or a lab testing service (anylabtestnow.com). But if you can't, I'd suggest taking a vitamin-B complex pill and fish oil every day for the next month (which will cost you roughly $1.33 per day). Those are two of the most common deficiencies that anxious people have. I take TwinLab's Stress B Complex Caps ($20), and Coromega Omega-3 Squeeze Packets ($20). You can find them both on Amazon or at Whole Foods. Within 30 days, your brain will feel much more at peace. 4) PLAY / EXERCISE. Kyle is sedentary for most of the day, because his work requires him to sit and type. He goes on long runs a few times each week, but thinks he should be exercising more. For fun, he goes out with friends to movies and concerts, and enjoys reading at home. He feels anxious around people, and worries about "cracking" (making a fool of himself, breaking down). My recommendations: Exercise is SO important for curbing anxiety (I try to lift heavy weights 3-4 times per week). But exercise isn't sustainable if it feels like a miserable chore. Exercise should be fun; it needs to be play! Running can be fun for some people, but for me, it's torture. That's why I play homerun derby, catch, basketball, and other games that are fun and mildly competitive. If you're going to run, do it while playing a sport -- sprinting in short bursts is much better than jogging (who looks healthier in the Olympics: long-distance runners or sprinters?) Sign up for a co-ed sport where you'll have to run around and wear yourself out (you'll get to have guilt-free fun each week and make friends this way). Or just buy an Aerobie flying ring ($9 on Amazon) and play catch with a buddy. And when it comes to social anxiety, it's extremely easy to stave that off by spending more time around loving people who accept you and want to have fun. Make the effort to see someone you care about every day, and bond with them while playing. Oh, and stay off your cell phone - stop Instagramming your play and just PLAY! 5) CUTTING OUT THE NEWS. Kyle finds himself reading/watching news stories about school shootings, local crime, corruption, the wavering economy, etc. And even though it makes him feel scared, he believes it's important to stay informed. The TV programs he regularly watches are about zombies and the apocalypse. He also plays video games about war, like Call of Duty. My recommendations: The thoughts you allow into your conscious mind determine the quality of your life. You are what you think. And if you give the news permission to determine what you're thinking about, I GUARANTEE you are going to feel scared, depressed, and anxious. That's because it's in the news' financial interest to shock you and grab your attention; they only stay in business when you see their advertisements! If you're still under the assumption that you need to know "the truth" and that you can actually get it from the news or some conspiracy website, it's time to let go of the witch hunt. You will never know for sure what's going on in the world -- ever -- but that lack of knowledge shouldn't affect how you live your life RIGHT NOW. Stop worrying about the news, it's just noise. Make a conscious effort to cut the news and other scary content out of your life, and replace it with things that will make you happy (positive books, uplifting music, inspiring films -- anything but anxiety-inducing content). Only allow good stuff into your mind; keep the stuff that makes you feel bad out (at least for the next month). # # # And those are my top 5 anxiety killers: - Sleep - Diet - Fixing nutrient deficiencies - Play / Exercise - Cutting out the news

Have you noticed that you often fall into a pattern of all or nothing thinking? Do people sometimes tell you that you are too simplistic in your judgment of a situation or a person? Black and white thinking is one of the cognitive distortions that the human brain generates. 'Cognitive distortion' sounds like a bad thing, but it isn't necessarily bad. It's just a way that our brains have evolved over millennia to simplify things for us, so that in a complicated (and possibly dangerous) situation we can make a snap judgment and act quickly for our own safety. It works very well. Why we're hard wired to see the world in black and white Think how often, in the long course of human history, a human being walking along has spotted something long and thin and black on the path. Is it a stick? Is it a poisonous snake? What are the consequences of coming to the wrong conclusion? It makes sense for us, more often than not, to conclude that it's a snake, and leap out of the way quick smart. Even if it's only a stick, we haven't lost anything by our leap. Our brains 'know' this. So we're hard wired to look at the world in very clear cut terms of 'threat' or 'safety', because this is an essential survival tool. All or nothing thinking has serious limitations But you've probably heard that old line "When your only tool is a hammer, all problems look like nails." The threats we face in modern times are not usually dangerous animals. It's more likely to be a bullying boss. Or a cheating partner. Or financial worries. Black and white thinking is really no help in dealing with things like that, because the threats involved are not instant life or death choices. Not only is it no help, it can lead us into depression. And depressed people are even more likely to think in these extreme terms than those who are not depressed. So a vicious circle gets set up. When you're facing a complicated problem, like noticing that you're not getting promoted and wondering if it's because a work colleague has taken a dislike to you and has been turning your boss against you or because you're not doing the job very well, you need a different way to think about things. You need to be able to see many aspects of a situation, and weigh them all up, and come to a considered conclusion.

10 Thoughts to Remove from Your Mind

Here are some thoughts to avoid so you can transcend the hell out of failure. 1. “I already know everything I need to know.” Often the most stubborn people struggle with failure and setbacks. When we assume we already know everything there is to know it makes it difficult to understand why we aren’t succeeding. How to reframe: People are always learning. If something isn’t working for me, there is probably another way to look at things. I am constantly learning each and every day. “If your mind is empty, it is always ready for anything, it is open to everything. In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s mind there are few. ” ― Shunryu Suzuki 2. “I don’t need help from anyone. I can do this on my own.” When we are unwilling to seek out and accept the help of others we are basically deciding to learn the hard way. We all need help from others, whether it’s emotional support or actual resources. No one made it to the top without the help of others. How to reframe: It is okay to ask for and accept help from others. It is actually more courageous to seek help than to deny I have a problem. Getting assistance from others is a necessary step in reaching my potential. 3. “I should always be in control.” If there is one thing constant in life it’s change. There are many things out of our control and learning to accept what we cannot change is pivotal in overcoming life’s obstacles. Learning to let go allows us to live with greater peace of mind. How to reframe: I am adaptable and able to change along with my circumstances. I will focus on what I can control and accept what I cannot change. 4. “If I fail it means I’m a failure.” There is a big difference between making a mistake and failing to reach a desired outcome, and actually viewing ourselves as a “failure.” We will fail but that is a part of the process. Who we are doesn’t change because of our mistakes. How to reframe: I may not like to fail but it is inevitable and I can find the silver lining. When I fail, I will learn what I can do different next time. I will use failure as my teacher. “Don’t be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.” – Lily Tomlin 5. “I’m not smart enough, old enough, rich enough… (You fill in the excuse).” There could be countless reasons why you’re not ready or prepared to achieve your goals. Notice your excuses. Determine what limiting beliefs are holding you back and realize the lies you are telling yourself. Reframe: I may not have the ideal circumstances but I will use what I have and be the best I can be. I will stop making excuses and following beliefs that don’t serve me. 6. “I’ll never get over this problem.” This is a classic pessimistic interpretation. If we believe things will never get better we won’t be very motivated to work through problems. No problem lasts forever unless we make it a problem for forever. Reframe: No problem is permanent. I can deal with whatever I am facing. It may not be easy but I know that all problems pass with time. 7. “My circumstances won’t allow me to do that.” Many times we blame our environment on our failure. We use our job or boss as the reason we can’t get ahead. We even go as far as to blame society for our own issues. Talk about giving away accountability and power. Reframe: I am the co-creator of my life. My circumstances do not define me. I will take action and create the circumstances I desire. No more letting my external world determine my state of mind. 8. “I have never been the type of person to do that.” It is easy to base what we are capable of doing in the future on what we have done in the past. If I have failed at something over and over again, it is easy to assume I’m not meant to do it. It is a fact that learning anything requires practice and with enough practice we can do just about anything. Reframe: I will let go of my past identity. Just because I haven’t accomplished my goals doesn’t mean I never can. The past is in the past, and I will take the necessary steps to mold my skills, talents, and traits. 9. “I not good at dealing with stress.” We can all learn to manage stress more effectively. Frankly the more stress we deal with effectively the more natural it becomes. We can all learn new ways of thinking and behaving to help us handle stress, and ultimately build up a stress tolerance. Reframe: Stress is normal and healthy as long I learn to cope with it. Stress exists to communicate what my needs are. I will listen to my stress and find a healthy way to cope with it. “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.” – Bill Cosby 10. “What will other people think of me?” Worrying about what other people think of us is part of the human experience. We tend to want people to like us and approve of what we do. However, this is also a trap because we may sabotage our own wellbeing and success if it means someone else will give us approval. Reframe: Other people are more worried about themselves they are about me. I need to focus on what I think of what I do. I will follow my truth despite disproval from others. I will live with integrity.

Positive Thinking When you employ the power of positive thinking, how do you apply it? Are you working to overcome a limiting mindset or to adopt a positive one? Do your positive thoughts include pictures, sounds and feelings? While you’re at it, what is your vision for your life based on? Did you form it around your past, your present or your future? You and I have these movies we play in our head. They start with a dialog and then move into pictures. Then they become moving pictures, and finally, we attach feelings to them. Motivated by our personal vision These mind movies and the feelings that come with them are what I like to call our personal visions. They are three-dimensional and they have feelings attached. These personal visions are also great motivation generators. The energies that fuel our ability to attract and our ability to act grow out of these visions. The degree of contrast between what is actually taking place in our life now, and what we envision achieving, motivates us to close the gap as we move towards that vision. These positive energies can be defined as: Enthusiasm Physical Energy Courage Persistence Confidence Conviction Creativity Focus + Visualization + Belief = Success

Learn to meditate effectively. The mind is naturally a very noisy machine which wants to move from one subject to another like an unchained monkey. One must learn to restrain and discipline it if one is to achieve anything of substance and to be peaceful, Meditation for 20 minutes in the morning and 20 minutes in the evening will certainly provide you with exceptional results if regularly practiced for 6 months.

1. A boring, safe life. There you go, I said it. If you want the boring option then go right ahead, stick with what you know. 2. A life without surprises & excitement. Stepping outside of your comfort zone makes life interesting! It means you get to experience new things and life will constantly surprise you! 3. A life led by fear. If you choose not to step out of your comfort zone, you’re essentially being ruled by fear. Your fear is stopping you from exploring. This is not a very nice way to live. 4. A life of jealousy where you are constantly wishing for other people’s lives. The easiest way to put a stop to jealousy is to get out there and create the life that you dream of! 5. A wasted life! Don’t waste your life by settling for less than you deserve. Life is supposed to be fun and exciting and an adventure! Choose the kind of life you want to live.

play

Play is what we all LOVE to do. Play is where our subconscious naturally guides us. Play is the state where we are truly ourselves, once we let go of our egos and fear of looking stupid. Play immerses us in the moment, where we effortlessly slip into flow. Play allows us to imagine, to create, to bond with and understand each other. Play is what creates our strongest social circles. And most importantly, play utterly destroys anxiety. Play gets you around other humans, face-to-face, and allows you to form a real connection with them. Play allows you to stop taking your life so damn seriously, so you can start living again. Life was never supposed to feel so serious or scary in the first place! The people who try to convince you that it has to be that way just aren’t very good at playing. They’ve forgotten what it’s like. So have a laugh, remind them, then go find better playmates. Everyone is looking for someone to have fun with. Go out, create your own games, then get others to join in. Just play. You don’t need more money. You don’t need more free time. You can always do it. Play is a state of mind – it is a way to approach the world. It’s only a choice: Anxiety or Play. Take your pick. “Man is God’s plaything, and that is the best part of him. Therefore every man and woman should live life accordingly, and play the noblest games… What, then, is the right way of living? Life must be lived as play…” – Plato

five simple tips about asking assertively be clear about what you want before you ask for it avoid apologizing (eg saying "sorry to ask") be confident - don't use tentative phrases like "Could you possibly...?" keep it short, simple & to the point sound positive & expect to get "Yes" for an answer Five simple things to avoid when you want to say "No" Making excuses, such as "I'm meeting friends" when you're not - you may get found out Saying "I don't mind" when you do mind - & giving a confusing message Saying "Yes" because you feel bad saying "No", then sabotaging & not doing what you agreed to Saying "Yes" when you mean "No", then stressing all week about how to get out of it Saying "No" at first, then retracting & saying "Yes", because you feel guilty Assertiveness skills help you say "No" confidently, politely, respectfully and effectively

How not to miss a deadline So how can you keep track of everything and never miss a deadline? Here are five top tips: 1. Be mindful of Parkinson’s Law, the theory that we fill up all the time we have for a task. This does not mean you are working on the task all the time, but rather leave it until close to the required date. If you have a day to do a task, you’ll do it by the end of the day; if you have a week to do a task, you’ll finish it by the end of the week; similarly if you have a month, you’ll take a month to deliver the same task. 2. Buy a year planner and put in your deadline date for each goal. 3. Choose your own deadline dates prior to the ones set for you & put them on your planner. How long before will depend on the size of the task. If you’re writing a 3-page report, you might finish 3 days before, leaving enough time to proof read, check with others if relevant and fine tune it with a clear head after a day away from it. If you’re writing a book, your pre-deadline date might be one month before. 4. Mark out times on your planner to carry out your tasks working backwards from each goal date. 5. Put your year planner on a wall & look it at daily.

Don't delay what matters: do the most important task first Don't develop piles: put your papers away where they belong Avoid the battle of the bulge! For every new item or paper you acquire, rid yourself of another Feeling overwhelmed by a giant task? Break it down into tiny, manageable bits Don't lose track: make daily to do lists & transfer yesterday's left over tasks to today...or tomorrow

doubts

A new situation is presented and the mind doubts that you can do it. This then becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy as the mind looks for evidence to reinforce that belief. Look back into your past and you'll find moments of insight, mindfulness, acceptance and compassion. A simple practice such as putting your hand on your heart and doing a mindful check-in, being the ambassador of compassion, or just mindful breathing allows you to tap into a space of awareness and water the seeds of choice, power, growth and freedom that have always been inside you.

negative thoughts

An easy exercise to interrupt negative thoughts 1.Write down what you have been thinking negatively about. 2.Write the extreme negative statement that comes to mind. 3.Now write three 'middle of the road' possibilities - not so exciting (or terrifying), but a more realistic take on what is actually more likely to happen. Giving your brain more options will reduce emotionality and allow you to think more clearly.

earn money online

Write way to earn JOBS: Blogging, micro-blogging , Tweeting, freelance writing, editing, e-authoring and translating. SKILLS: Comprehensive writing skill and expertise in any field. INCOME: 500 for a 300-word article to 1 lakh a month for full-time blogging . Your thoughts are worth more than a penny now. Your scribbles and musings can earn you big bucks, if you know how to market them well. If you are unsure of your talent, start by writing a blog. It's easy to begin—just join a blogging site, such as Blogspot or Wordpress, and start writing. There is no training institute for this and only through trial and error will you discover what appeals to readers. However, bloggers are flooding the virtual world and if you want to stand out and get noticed by readers and advertisers , you will need to provide information or advice that no one else can, or provide it in a way that is better than others. You can join a writers ' community, where people freely dispense tips on improving writing or increasing readership (see How to increase blog traffic). Once you find your literary footing, it may be better to have your own Website and domain name. This gives you a specific identity, and if you submit your blog's URL to search engines, it will become more noticeable on the Net. The charges for a domain name usually range from 300-1 ,000 a year. The main source of income for most bloggers is Google AdSense, which places contextual ads on Websites. As new mediums open up, you need to adapt and leverage these. Hrish Thota did so when he evolved from blogging to Tweeting. Thota has been blogging for almost a decade and joined Twitter when it was launched in 2006. He is now a professional Tweeter, who has 4,500 followers and earns about 1 lakh a month. The 31-year-old , who is a former employee of consulting firm Capgemini, began his Twitter career by writing about events and computer hardware in Bangalore. Within a year, as his network of followers grew, companies began to approach him to Tweet about their products. Recently, he was involved with a campaign for Ford Figo for around a month-and-a-half , where he had to do a road show from Chandigarh to Chennai, Tweeting and photo-blogging about the events in real time. On an average, he earns 30,000-40 ,000 a month per brand. As important as your writing skill is your ability to network. "Before you begin to post your views, you need to create a community. You should go to various meets and events to develop contacts," says Thota. Though writing seems easy at first glance, if you want to earn money from it, you will have to work hard. Professional bloggers put in about 2-5 hours every day and constantly strive to write on topics that provide updated information. You need to be regular and prompt in answering your readers' queries. If you have honed your skills and are confident about what you write, you could even publish a book a la Anupam Mukerji, who became famous for his blog, the Fake IPL Player , written cheekily about the IPL's second season. In March last year, he published a book, The Gamechanger. However, if no publisher seems interested in the physical realm, don't despair. You can write a virtual bestseller . E-books are in high demand across the world and many people are writing exclusively for this segment. In June this year, crime novelist John Locke became the first independent author to sell more than 1 million ebooks through Kindle's (Amazon) direct publishing programme, under which you do not need an agent or a publisher. Each e-book was sold for $0.99 (` 48), of which Locke pocketed 35 cents (` 17). Global classroom JOBS: E-tutoring . SKILLS: Domain knowledge and good communication skills. INCOME: 5,000-50 ,000 a month (for 8-hour sessions) depending on the subject and region (India/international). When Shyamila Rana's husband got a job in Dehradun in 2007, the 42-year-old school teacher began applying for a post in various schools in the city. Unfortunately, not many were willing to hire her, citing age as a factor . Rana was unwilling to waste her experience and time, so she began looking elsewhere. She soon found hundreds of overseas students, who were eager to learn science from her. "One of my husband's colleagues told him about e-tutoring and I sent an application , along with my resume, to one of the Websites," says Rana, who now teaches science for four hours to students based in the US. For this, she is earning better than she would in a traditional school. E-tutoring is a process in which a teacher educates a student or a group of students on a particular subject through online technology. This can involve the use of Web-based programs and includes data, voice and video communication. The tutor can send questions, receive completed papers , provide results and recommendations , clarify concepts, assist on assignments , etc. To begin in this field, you can sign up with some established names such as TutorVista.com. Says Alok Bansal, chief executive officer of Gurgaon-based Alethia Education Services: "To start a career as an online tutor, you should know the content well and be conversant with technology." Another aspect you need to consider is the working hours, especially if you are teaching international students. Atul Kulshreshtha recognised the lacuna in this field in 2007 when he decided to venture into online teaching . The Noida-based chartered accountant is a serial Web entrepreneur, who started two advisory services portals in 2000. A few years later, he launched a BPO company, Cleave Global E-Services , which he sold last year. As he was comfortable with the Net and had the technical expertise, Kulshreshtha invested almost 10 crore in setting up infrastructure, buying equipment and hiring teachers , before he finally launched Extramarks .com in 2008. Although the going was tough initially, today Extramarks .com has a support base of around 150 teachers and has 7 lakh students enrolled in various programmes . It has nine offices in different parts of the country and had a turnover of 60 crore last year. Virtual bazaar JOBS: Online enterprise. SKILLS: Guts, gumption and marketing savvy. INCOME: Whatever you want. Shakil Thasariya began collecting autographs as a 13-year-old schoolboy, when the former President APJ Abdul Kalam gave him one in 2003. A year later, he discovered that his passion could be profitable when he sold 10 autographs to an antique dealer for `4,000. However, finding buyers in his hometown, Rajkot, Gujarat, wasn't easy. The perfect avenue: eBay. The portal opened up access to a wider and more keen clientele. He made quite a few successful sales and also got in touch with a lot of autograph dealers in the US and Europe. "This business of selling autographs is based on trust, especially if you are doing so online. To have a credible long-term reputation, I offer my clients a 100% money-back guarantee if they discover that my autographs are fake," says Thasariya, who earns about `7,000 a month by selling 7-8 autographs. The online medium is a perfect platform for small entrepreneurs or startups , who cannot afford to rent office space or shop. However, maintaining a Website also requires work and money. A free and easily manageable platform is social networking sites, most notably Facebook. Say Nikita Fernandes and Vinisha Dugar: "We were already members of Facebook and had a wide circle of friends, so when we decided to launch our own business, Fishing Hook, using the site was a logical choice. Besides, managing a dedicated Website would become too difficult to handle." The two Mumbai-based friends launched their business in July last year. They outsourced accessories from China and Hong Kong, put up their photographs on Facebook and then sell these in India. Within three months, they had about 500 fans on their page and were generating orders worth about 10,000, of which 3,000 was their profit margin. Initially, they would deliver the products themselves and collect cash from customers. However, as their clientele grew in other cities, they began to courier the products and charge 100 as shipping charges. In September this year, they joined hands with an e-commerce portal, Ebagsfull.com, where they have put their products on display. Today, their Facebook page has nearly 2,100 fans and their client base has expanded to Delhi, Pune, Hyderabad, Bangalore and Kolkata. There are hundreds of online sellers who are leveraging the World Wide Web to create wealth. And this is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. courtesy times of india

Here are 3 new dependable ways to help you attract what you're wanting by quickly and easily changing your resonating emotion. 1. Prayer Prayer is deliberate thought that creates miracles. The shift in thought between normal thinking and prayer holds infinite power. It changes your emotional state instantly because it puts your ego aside and allows you to hand over your sense of control. It helps you move from ego to humility. It raises your resonance from fear to faith. It brings reverence to what you're asking for. It reminds you that you are part of the sacred. It's a discussion with the Universe, the Divine, God. Whatever you want to call it, prayer is the process of speaking what you want. Of getting clear on what you're asking and it's the first step in your understanding that life isn't completely in your control. 2. Join Forces In Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, there is a beautiful passage where she creates an invisible petition for what she wants and starts listing people (dead and alive) that would sign her petition. It's a powerful testament to the idea that we are not alone in wanting what we want. And this is an exercise that I suggest for anyone who really wants something - especially if they feel isolated or alone in the wanting of it. Whether you are wanting success, health, or love, there are countless people who want the same for you. Your task is to join forces with them. Join the team that wants what you want. See your desires as benefitting the greater good. List the people dead, alive, known and unknown that would want what you want. What may start as feeling isolated or alone begins to feel powerful, connected, and supported. Witness that miracle happen within you. Feel the support and connection of your amassed army. And join that force. 3. Surrender This is the one that I'm the worst at. I like to think I have control. I like my fancy illusion of micro-managing, powering-through and making things happen. But, the world just doesn't work like that. God doesn't work like that. Nature doesn't work like that. Hell, my 9-month-old Golden Retriever doesn't work like that. Life doesn't happen on my time table according to my plan. And for the things that I have really wanted in my life... I have had to surrender and hand it over. As David Whyte says, "Your great mistake is to act the drama as if you were alone." Surrender means to understand your place in things. To do what you can do and to trust that life will handle the rest. It means to allow for help. To become part of a team. Whether it is with nature, other human beings or with the Divine.

find good people

Step 1) Identify what you value in people. Step 2) Identify where this type of person spends time. Step 3) Go there. Whether it is a church, gym, beach, dance lessons, bootcamp fitness class, Chamber of Commerce meeting, local lectures, weekend seminars, weekly group meetings, or a positive Internet forum, you don't meet good people by watching TV...but good people ARE out there. Go forth and find them. Let this quote give you some inspiration: "When you take action, particularly bold action, the boundaries of what you believe to be possible (your belief system) expand. Which, in turn, gives you the capacity to consider new ideas, new possibilities, and new concepts that you previously thought to be impossible." – Robert Ringer Live and lead by example. Attract the right people into your life, both in the 'real-world' and on the Internet. Take full responsibility for your social network. After all, you are responsible for your results in all areas of life. When you accept your results without casting blame and you learn from your mistakes so as to not make the same mistakes again, only then will you achieve what you want and have the right people in your life. That is how you must live and that is why you will succeed. If what you are doing now is not working, then you must change. Don't rely on doing "normal" things to get extraordinary results, because it doesn't work that way. Normal and average behaviors only get you average results, and those just aren't very good these days.

The Five Agreements

Be Impeccable With Your Word: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. Don Miguel Ruiz The five principles are knowing, being with, doing for, enabling/empowering and maintaining belief According to don Miguel Ruiz, everything we do is based on agreements we have made — agreements with ourselves, with other people, with God, and with life. But the most important agreements are the ones we make with ourselves. With these agreements we tell ourselves who we are, how to behave, what is possible, what is impossible. The Five Agreements: 1.BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. 2.DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. 3.DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life. 4.ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are tired as opposed to well rested. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret. 5.BE SKEPTICAL, BUT LEARN TO LISTEN Don’t believe yourself or anybody else. Use the power of doubt to question everything you hear: Is it really the truth? Listen to the intent behind the words, and you will understand the real message.

So, how do you get out of a rut? Here are 3 suggestions for you. Sometimes it only takes one of these tips to begin building momentum again. Other times, it may require more effort. 1. Connect again with your Creator Almost every time I find myself in a rut it is because I drifted in my personal walk with God. He never moves. You are as close to God as you choose to be. We are the ones that drift. We let other matters get in the way of what is most important. There is a hole in your life that only God can fill. You were wired to worship something. Just be sure your worship is focused in the right direction. 2. Get up and move I think one of the main causes for the rise in depression today is directly connected to our sedentary lifestyles. Our bodies were not built to sit all day. Our minds were not built to stay in neutral at the television screen. If you are a parent, then you will get this. If I allow my kids to watch 3 hours of TV when they come home from school, their behavior and physiology changes usually for the worse. They become whiny, aggravated, and frustrated. There is a valid reason why moms across America make their kids get out and play. You just might be in a rut because you need to change your physiology. Get up and move! 3. Choose to be present in your relationship talk I will admit up front that this is easier for the ladies than it is for the men. Men we have to work extra hard at this. Regardless, all of us have the tendency to “be elsewhere” when engaged in a conversation. Technology is stealing the beauty and color of our relationships and conversations.

abit #1: Give Time for Exercise (Physical) While working out in the morning is not my favorite, I love the feeling of having checked it off my list. I start my workday with a spring in my step feeling good that I have taken care of myself. Another good reason to try and workout in the morning is to create a buffer. If for some reason I am unable to exercise in the morning, I still have a few available slots in my day. I usually try to target lunchtime as a backup if I miss my morning exercise time. I didn’t have that buffer when I was focused on exercising in the evenings. Habit #2: Allow Time for Thinking (Mental) You will be amazed at how much stuff is swirling around in that brain of yours. You have ideas, thoughts, and to dos that need to be nurtured. The first step is to get it out of your head. I have a morning habit known as Morning Pages (read about the concept here). It is unstructured writing or journaling. The goal is to write at least 750 words first thing in the morning. You can write about anything. Let your mind wonder and write down whatever comes to mind. Once I get it all out, I go back over it and look for: Items I need to add to my to do list Reoccurring themes I need to deal with Ideas I need to nurture People I need to reach out to It really is amazing how much stuff comes bubbling to the surface when you just sit down and write. It is good for the mental side of you. You can also choose to read a good book as a way to feed your mental side as well. Another option is to listen to a podcast while exercising in order to do something for both the physical and the mental. Habit #3: Offer Time for Devotions (Spiritual) The spiritual side of me is extremely important. It is a reminder to me that I am a part of a bigger story that just my little world. There is a God that has created me. He desires to spend time with me. I do this by reading Scripture, praying, and spending time just being thankful. This also helps me to not only start my day off right, but to have the right attitude, perspective, and thought as I go throughout my day.

how to take care of negative thoughts

Spend some time alone reading the Scriptures The book of Psalms is a great place to go when you feel in a negative mood. For one, the writer holds nothing back about the negative feelings he is having about life. He tells God everything that is going on in his heart and spirit. At the same time, you always see a shift happening in these psalms. Once the writer gets his focus off of his thoughts and instead thinks about God and how awesome He is, he begins to change his negative thoughts. By reading 5 Psalms a day you can get all the way through the book of Psalms in a month. Decide to journal and get it all out Sometimes when we have all of these negative thoughts swirling in our head it helps to get them out on paper. Journaling can be incredibly enlightening as overtime you see the same trends appearing in your life. It also is a way to get it all out. When you journal, do not be concerned with spelling or grammar, just get out when is in your mind. Slow down and enjoy the moment Other times our negative thoughts are self-inflicted. By that I mean that we have brought the negativity on ourselves and not because there is anything really bad happening in our life. The negative thoughts come about because we are frustrated with the lack of progress we have in our lives. In times like these, we can benefit from taking a deep breath and just slowing down for a bit. We, as Americans, live life at a rapid pace. We bring on most of the stress in our lives by how we choose to live. Learn the habit of slowing down. Laugh with a friend, play board games with the kids, watch the sunset, spend an evening fishing in a nearby lake. Just slow down. Learn the habit of slowing down. Enjoy being in the moment. Click To Tweet Powered By CoSchedule Go on a walk with a friend Talking through the thoughts in our head can be a great thing as well. Go on a walk with someone you enjoy being around and tell them everything that is going on between your two ears. Just by doing this you will come up with solutions to your own problems. It is funny how different our negativity sounds when we verbalize it. Talk with a friend. It is funny how different our negativity sounds when we verbalize it.

we can win the world: be fiery

we can win the world: be fiery: 1st - Never Take Crap From Anyone This perhaps is the 1st Law of Power in the Book of Fieriness. People say, you gotta learn how to give ...

crunch time

Listen to music This is a very personal thing and most likely doesn't work for everyone. The point here would be to do something that relaxes you - and only do that. Pull your hands away from the keyboard and do something else besides your work. Go to Lunch In many software business, employees forget to take a lunch. Did you know, by law, that you're allotted a one hour lunch period if you work more than six hours in one day? Heh. Some of you are thinking, Gee, what about those days when I'm working 14 hours? Surely you deserve a three hour break. Another thing. Consider the fact that, well, I've been there too and I know how you feel. Sometimes there just isn't time to give yourself the luxury of a lunch break. My thoughts are if you don't have the time, and you're not ok with that, and your employer is... then you're at the wrong job. Leave. Work at home I know. It's killer. You're spouse/friend(s) hates it when you do it. But if you work better at home, then by all means, go for it if you have the chance. Of course, I am specifically talking to the code monkeys out there - and you know you don't always have to be at work to get work done. I advise, however, if you are a work-aholic, do not do this. Please keep in mind that these are "crunch time" strategies for average developers. Think about this... What's the worse that could happen? Most likely this is the unteenth time you've been in the situation, are you going to get fired? Relax. Of course, by all means, do try harder and don't slack off. In fact, you should work harder during crunch time. Afterall, don't you remember the question they asked you during your interview?

cash crunch

ere are ways you can spot a potential cash crunch before it occurs: Know your business. If you have seasonal needs – whether for more employees, more inventory, or greater expenses – and those needs will have to be paid for ahead of receiving payment for goods or services, build up sufficient reserves or get a line of credit in place ahead of time. Only take on debt you can handle. If you borrow money, make sure you can afford to make payments based on current operations, not on the potential of future increases in sales and earnings. If the growth you hoped for doesn't occur, you may find it difficult to make payments. Keep inventory at a minimum. Money you spend on inventory is cash out until those goods are sold. If you can purchase inventory on credit, great – but make sure you have a good sense of your inventory aging and related accounts receivable so you can feel comfortable you will receive payment before you are required to make payment. What if, despite your best efforts, you find yourself short of cash? Talk to your lender. Make contact as soon as possible; the more desperate you are the greater risk you tend to pose to the lender and the lower your chances for approval. Increase rapid payment terms. Ask solid customers to pay earlier in return for a larger discount. Sometimes a quick phone call explaining your situation could pay off; some customers will be happy to help you through a crisis, especially if they feel the favor might be returned someday. Require payments in advance. If you can't afford to extend more credit, require payment up front. Some customers may balk at the idea, but if taking new orders by extending credit only digs a deeper hole, you may have no choice. Cut expenses wherever possible. Just keep in mind the last place you may want to cut is sales. Consider barter arrangements. Instead of paying for services, you may be able to provide services in kind to some of your vendors. While you will have to provide the service in return, at least doing so will not require cash. Hold accounts payable for a longer period of time. Paying on time is of course your goal, but if you don't have the cash you may have no choice. But before you do: Renegotiate with vendors. Call and explain your situation. Try to establish different terms. You can also shop around for other, possibly less expensive, providers. Sell inventory, especially slow moving inventory. Even if you sell at reduced prices, you still generate short-term cash flow. However, keep in mind that if you sell at reduced prices to current customers, you should let them know you're holding a special sale and that prices will return to normal levels in the future. Sell and lease-back company assets. Say you own manufacturing equipment; you could sell and then lease back that same equipment; in effect it's like taking a loan on the equipment you own. Sell unneeded assets. If you don't use it, sell it. While you're at it, try to eliminate your need for external storage facilities by weeding out unused equipment, furnishings, or fixtures.

be fiery

1st - Never Take Crap From Anyone This perhaps is the 1st Law of Power in the Book of Fieriness. People say, you gotta learn how to give in, every now and then. That’s bull, as far as fieriness is concerned. Giving in or taking crap from someone is the same thing as letting your flames to die down. You must always fan the flames – never back down. 2nd - Say Your Piece When you’ve got something to say, say it, and move on. It doesn’t matter who agrees with you, say it anyways. People can’t help but respect someone with an opinion. 3rd - Back Your Words With Action A fiery person must always live by his or her words. The moment you say something and do something else, or worse, do nothing, you lose your fire power and might never get it back! 4th - You Need Fiery Balls You can’t be fiery, if you ain’t got boldness. It’s that simple. You need to stand your ground, and there’s no school where you can learn this – it’s either you have it or you don’t. And if you don’t, fake it till you have it. Whatever you do, get those balls of fire! 5th - Be Smooth As Hell Understand the oxymoron here...you’re fiery, you can’t be slick in a phony, corny way...hell is fiery, so be smooth as hell! Ha! 6th - Be Unpredictable Never allow anyone to pin you down...once that happens, you become boring and irrelevant. 7th - Always Reinvent Yourself You can’t afford to be irrelevant, so you gotta reinvent yourself. Notice how fire burns erratically...that’s how you gotta be. 8th - Be Intellectual It’s simple – dumb people can never be fiery! The art of fieriness is perfected in having true intellect. If you aren’t born with it, you’ve gotta read like a madman – read everything and anything; absorb all knowledge. You gotta know a bit about everything; and when you can, know more than a bit about something. Fire with intellect is irresistible! 9th - Have A Lot of Swag You’ve gotta have this – call it cocky or whatever; but it really is confidence. It’s true meekness is all nice and they’ll inherit the Earth and all, but think like Elijah, the fiery prophet, and a chariot of fire might just carry you to heaven. Ha! 10th - Be Charismatic When you’ve become super fiery...you’ve gotta back it up with charisma, unless you just become annoying most of the time. Charisma is what helps fine tune your flames, so people can drink in and digest your liquid-fire. 11th - Have Dark Humour Dark comedy is priceless in the life of a fiery one. You’ve gotta see humour in things that are dark. When you’re corny all the time – people get fed up with you. For you to achieve appreciation in dark humour you must develop a followership for works by Stephen King and Quentin Tarantino. 12th - You’ve Gotta Love Movies And none of that Jennifer Aniston romantic comedy crap, either! 13th – Be Supernatural It’s tough to be fiery, without having a spiritual side. The supernatural, apart from providing the balance in your life, gives you the right amount of enigma in order for you to blast off! 14th – Think Seven Steps Ahead It doesn’t have to be seven steps, exactly. Seven just sounds cooler, as you know. You’ve gotta anticipate things before they happen. This is pivotal to being fiery. 15th – Be Mysterious Not in a weird, freaky way or anything. But a hint of enigma never hurts. 16th – Be Classy The opposite sex will love you for it. Fire with class is always wholesome. 17th – Give Respect Never fail to respect anyone who deserves it. In doing this, you’ll get back respect. And you must be respected to be fiery in the eyes of men. And never under any circumstance should you lose your respect in the eyes of men. This is very essential – once you lose it, take a gun and blow your brains out. What’re you living for? 18th – Be Honest There’s a lot of virtue in being fiery. Honesty is one of them. Never, ever lie. Once you get used to it, telling the truth comes easy. Never bullshit! 19th – Know How To Handle Women Whether you admit it or not, women have the power in this world, and the crazy part is, they don’t even have to occupy any political position or seats of authority to exercise this. Their problem is, they don’t realize this! As a fiery man, you should never deny this power, acknowledge it, harness it, and you’ll be rewarded endlessly. 20th – Be A Ruler As the old saying goes - Do not wait for a coronation; the greatest emperors crown themselves. If you want something take it...don’t wait for it to come to you. Yes it sounds cliché and all. But that’s the sum of being fiery. Sorry to break it down to ya, but fiery people lead the pack...always.

self-forgiveness.

Consider the fact that there are times when you have wronged yourself and you may need self-forgiveness. Set your judgments aside and try this short practice: Close your eyes, put your hand on your heart and say softly to yourself: "In the ways I have hurt my mind, body or spirit, knowingly or unknowingly, may I forgive myself. I extend forgiveness."

Life is short, live it. Love is rare, grab it. Anger is bad, dump it. Fear is awful, face it. Memories are sweet, cherish it

The Magic of Making Things

The Magic of Making Things I never was much for any kind of mechanical labor. If something breaks, I'm inclined to leave it broken. Give me a hammer and I'll try to screw in a lightbulb. One time I changed a tire and got really excited, until the spare tire nearly fell off as I drove along. Despite my ineptitude, there's something about the idea of mechanical labor that I relate to. I like the act of making or fixing things. The other day Nicky the genius developer and I were talking about a time when he was over at my house for a product launch a couple years ago. I brought him food from Pine State Biscuits, and it sat next to his workstation on the dining room table for four hours. He was so involved with his work! Eating was a secondary consideration. Personally, I don't skip breakfast, especially if it's from Pine State Biscuits. But just as I relate to being a mechanic even though I possess zero mechanical skills, I understand the principle: when you've got something you need to deliver, it becomes an all-consuming pursuit. *** On Wednesday morning I woke up with a hangover. It was a strange feeling, especially once I thought back to the night before. Instead of partying away, I had a single bourbon and simple syrup along with my Thai soup. Mostly I drank water and went to bed at 9:30pm. So why did I feel so disoriented? Oh, that's right, I remembered. Yesterday was launch day. Today must be launch hangover day. On a typical launch day I get up at 5am, but I'm hardly well-rested. After a 10-hour shift the day before, I toss and turn all night, worried that I've slept in and will forget to do something. I wake up constantly, thinking of things that still need to be done. There was a ton of work leading up to putting out Designed to Sell. It had an all-new design and a new checkout system. It's a more detailed and comprehensive product than we've built in quite some time. At one point a few days earlier our team was exchanging emails in the middle of the night, both pacific time and east coast time. But then a crazy thing happened: we delivered the product to the world, and everything worked as it should. There were lots of happy customers and no major snafus. Yay. *** Why do you do the kind of work you've chosen? For me, I want to build. Why struggle to create and deliver? Because it's fun and meaningful. "I want to be remembered as a person who wasn't afraid to start things." -Tina Roth Eisenberg This is the point. Sometimes the projects are profitable in a financial way, and that's great. Other times they're profitable in other ways, and that's great too. When people say they like something I've made, it feels just as rewarding. It's good to regularly ask yourself, "If you could do anything, what would it be?" For me, during this season, it would be working on this project.

Here are 10 affirmations to help you heal your heart now: 1. Love guides all my relationships. 2. All things are unfolding as they are supposed to. 3. When I bring myself to grief, It is healing 4. In my sadness, I love myself. 5. I will feel my grief but not wallow in it. 6. I honor the love more than the loss. 7. I can find happiness in any situation. 8. I love life, and life loves me. 9. I have lived and loved. 10. I am healed.

o recover from rejection, here’s a three-step plan… 1. Assume it’s them. When people end romantic relationships, they sometimes say, “It’s not you, it’s me.” This may be a cliché—but it’s also an important distinction. When you feel rejected, go ahead and tell yourself that it really is the person doing the rejecting who has mishandled the situation, not you. That won’t eliminate the sting of the rejection, but it should reduce the odds that you will fall into a downward spiral of self-criticism. 2. Focus on aspects of yourself that you deeply value. Take some time to think about this, and pay special attention to talents and attributes related to the aspect of your life where the rejection occurred—your key professional skills if the rejection was career-related, for example. Once you’ve identified several characteristics, choose one and write a brief essay on why it’s important to you. We are more convinced by things we write than by things we think, because writing activates additional parts of the brain. 3. Spend time around people who understand your worth. Being around people who value us can effectively counter the sting of rejection.

A three-part strategy for overcoming the pain of minor failures… 1. Blame your goal-setting strategy, not your abilities. People often take on big projects and set themselves tight deadlines—then blame their skills when they fall short. Instead, set a series of smaller, incremental, achievable goals. You’re likely to reach at least some of these incremental targets, easing any feelings of failure if others are missed. Example: Rather than try to lose 30 pounds in three months, try to lose one pound a week for 30 weeks. 2. Focus on factors within your control. Failing can make you feel helpless, as though you have tried your best and don’t know what else you can do. Such feelings can damage your motivation when making future efforts or make you give up entirely. The best thing to do is to focus on factors within your control. Example: You exhausted your contacts, you’re out of leads, and you still haven’t found a new job. Focus on the interim goal of expanding your contacts and professional network. Send a quick message to your Facebook friends and other social-media contacts asking if they know people in your field…and/or join relevant LinkedIn groups. 3. Learn the simple trick that could keep you from choking next time. Let’s say a bowler makes nine strikes in a row, then rolls a gutter ball on the tenth. What happened? He choked—he became so anxious that he overthought something that didn’t require much thought at all. Everyone chokes on occasion. Trouble is, once we’ve choked, we might start to worry that we’ll do so again, undermining our confidence. There’s a simple way to reduce the odds of choking—whistle. This works best when playing sports but can come in handy at other times, too. Whistling requires just enough brainpower to distract the part of our mind that might otherwise overthink things. If you’re bowling, start humming or whistling a tune (softly) as you pick up the bowling ball, and continue whistling until the ball is rolling toward the pins.

1. “I’m just the way I am.” This is a whopper. You are not “just the way you are” in a moment of fear, for example, any more than you are “just the way you are” in a moment of joy. “You” is not a single thing, like a rock. “You” are a powerful, complex, dynamic collection of parts. Every personality, including yours, has many different parts. Some of them are painful and destructive—such as anger, resentment and jealousy—and some of them are blissful and constructive—such as gratitude, appreciation and caring. You experience different emotions as different parts of your personality come and go. Sometimes, the part of your personality that is activated is anger. At other times, the part that is jealousy is activated, and at still other times, the part that is contentment is activated. When you are not aware of these parts, they control you, and you think, “This is just the way I am.” When you are aware of these different parts, you can choose not to act on those that are painful and destructive, and instead to act on those that are healthy and constructive. For example, when you are angry, you can choose to act with patience. This is not easy to do, but how easy is it to live a life of isolation and loneliness caused by your anger? 2. “I am unlucky.” This is a way of saying to yourself, “Things happen in my life that do not serve me.” If you were able to tell yourself the truth, you would say to yourself, each time something happens that you do not want, “Everything that happens in my life happens for a reason, and that reason has to do with my spiritual development.” Nothing in my life is random or by chance. All my experiences give me the opportunity to choose differently than I did before, to choose anew instead of recreating what I have created in the past with my choices. There is no “luck” involved in your life. There is only, and always, the compassion and wisdom of the Universe. 3. “This world is just too much for me.” This sentence prevents you from realizing that your experiences are always perfect for you, given the wisdom of the choices you have made. Every circumstance and interaction requires you to choose to act in fear (as you have done unconsciously before) or to act in love, consciously (acts of love are always conscious). You will have opportunities to act in love and to create a world of love with your choices until you die and your soul returns home. Each time you say, “This world is too much for me,” you squander one. You will always have others, but why wait to begin using them? 4. “I don’t have a reason for living.” This may be the biggest lie of all. Your soul has gifts to give, and you were born to give them. They may include raising a family, creating a business that incorporates the power of the heart, teaching children how to recognize love and fear in themselves and to choose love instead of fear. Giving the gifts that your soul wants to give always requires learning how to do that yourself. You have a sacred contract with the Universe, and no one can fulfill it except you. When you do, meaning and purpose flow into your life like a river flows into the ocean. Joy replaces fear, gratitude replaces jealousy, appreciation replaces anger and you bloom like a flower in the spring. That spring is always now, even when you feel that you are enveloped in an unending winter. Your life has a purpose, and everything in it serves that purpose. That purpose is to align your personality with your soul and to give the gifts that your soul longs to give. You do not disappoint the Universe when you tell yourself these lies and other lies that keep you limited. You keep yourself limited, and you live in the painful experiences of fear. When you recognize these lies, you can begin to replace them with truths. Here are some truths you can replace them with: All my experiences are perfect for my spiritual growth. I was born to create authentic power. I am a powerful and creative, compassionate and loving spirit.

To get out of your comfort zone: •Bring awareness to your comfort zone and your natural tendency to stay inside it. •Change your frame of mind. View your comfort zone not as a shelter but a prison. Embrace constructive discomfort. Don’t take the safe, known path. Choose challenge over comfort, and set goals that force you to get out of your comfort zone. Learn to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. •Gradually expand the perimeter of your comfort zone. Lean into the discomfort. Don’t sprint out of your comfort zone, take small but frequent steps. Push the walls out, don’t try to knock them down. •Periodically check your progress to confirm that you’re going further out over time. Read more: http://www.howtolive.com/get-out-of-your-comfort-zone/#ixzz2tGg6Mskl

habits of excellent people

1.Have the end in mind. This is the same habit as Stephen Covey's 1st habit, and with good reason. Everything starts with the end - the goal or the vision you want to fulfill. If you don't know what the end is, then there's no way of getting there, is there? Imagine getting into a cab. What do you first do when you get into the cab? Maybe you say hi to the taxi driver, then what? You tell the driver where you want to go, so that he can take you there. Similarly, you need to know what is the end you want to reach in order to get there. Hence, it's critical that you form clear goals of what exactly you want. What do you want? What is the end you envision? What are your personal goals and dreams for yourself? Personally, I have a vision board beside my bed where I have my dreams plastered over it. These dreams include developing The Personal Excellence Blog into one of the top personal development blogs, running my international personal excellence school, speaking to tens and thousands of people in seminars, achieving world peace, finding my soul mate, hitting the best seller's list with my books, and so on. These dreams remind me of what exactly I want and drive me forward every day. 2.Do what you love. When you do something you love, it's like you have unlimited fuel that keeps you going- day after day. The hunger to excel in it is just greater than if you do anything else. Every day, I'm endlessly driven to build and write at my blog, because it's for a cause I believe in. Helping people grow and live their best life is the one thing I know I want to be doing for the rest of my life. I have a coaching client who has tried to start 4-5 different ventures before (one at a time), and he was never able to succeed in any of them. Why was this the case? It wasn't that he was stupid, or that he was lazy. Ultimately, the reason was because he wasn't passionate about the things he was pursuing - he was just chasing money. The nature of the business didn't appeal to him emotionally. This is not to say starting businesses because you want to earn money is bad - all I'm saying is it's important that you love what you want to do first and foremost. What is it you love to do? If you are not sure what your passion is yet, then what is something you are most eager to try at the moment? If you can choose to do anything, what will it be? Your love and interest are fuels that will drive you towards excellence. 3.Work harder than anyone else. I don't know of anyone who has achieved excellent results who hasn't worked hard for them. A big component of excellence is hard work. Sheer, unadulterated hard work. We can streamline processes, choose effective strategies and steps, but ultimately the hard work will still have to come in. Fortunately, if you are doing what you love (step #2), work wouldn't even be work at all. In the past year since I set up The Personal Excellence Blog, I have spent countless hours, including weekends, building up the blog and writing high quality articles for readers out there. All these have paid off in their own way. I'm not saying you should abandon all social life because that defeats the purpose, but you will have to dedicate yourself to making your business a success. This year in 2010, I intend to increase my efforts even more compared to 2009, and I know it's going to pay off. 4.Make use of every moment. Every moment counts. Excellent people know that time is highly valuable. There's this quote by Donald Trump which I read in one of his books, and I absolutely love it. He said that time is more precious than money, because you can earn back money, but you can't get back time. That is absolutely true. Hence, I'm always making sure that I'm maximizing every moment. If I'm commuting over a distance, I'll pick up a book or listen to a podcast. If I'm out waiting for a friend, I'll take the chance to do something meaningful for the time being. If there are some pockets of time, I'll take out my laptop and do some work. Note that this habit doesn't mean working like a hog, 24x7. That wouldn't be a true application of this habit. Making use of every moment also refers to knowing when to rest and rejuvenate when it's needed, because this will help us walk the longer mile on the path of excellence. 5.Take action to achieve your results. Living a life of excellence means being a proponent of action. Many people often say "The sky is the limit". My personal philosophy is the sky isn't the limit; we are the limit. Whatever we do or don't do will determine how much we can grow or achieve. If we want to grow and achieve great results, we need to take the equivalent actions to reach the results we want. For example, many people agree that having press and media feature their business can greatly benefit them, but they believe it only happens when you are prominent enough. While that's usually true, I refuse to let that stop me. I took proactive steps to reach out to the press, writing my own press release and creating a strong story angle so the press would want to feature me. To date, I've been featured in the press for almost 20 times. To read more about how to be featured by the press, you can check out my guest post at Problogger: How To Get Featured By the Press (Repeatedly) Even If Your Blog is New. 6.Continuously upgrade yourself. Learning never stops. There is always something we can do to become better. We may have great skills and knowledge today, but no matter how great they may be, our skills need to be continuously developed. Excellent people are always learning, reading, exposing themselves to new knowledge, new people, new contexts and developing their skills. If you have played role-playing games or RPGs before, you would know that the characters need to be leveled up to get stronger and progress to the next level. Likewise, we need to always be leveling ourselves up to achieve excellence. 7.Ask for feedback. No matter how much we try to improve, we will have blind spots. Blind spots are things about ourselves that we don't know about, and we can't improve on things that we are blind to. Asking for feedback is one of the fastest and most effective ways to improve

You have to focus on where you are, and then you have to focus on where you want to go," he says. "There's so many things going on." "There's something that can be learned about simplifying things and focusing on exactly what's happening to you and exactly what you want to get out of what you're doing."

So how can you get away from the mindset of working hard and start working smart? 1. Get Help Yes, you might want to get to the top and say “I did it all myself.” The truth is, to succeed, you need to let other people help you. Read the acknowledgements in any bestselling book, and you’ll see the author giving credit to a whole host of supporters – editors, agents, friends, family. Help can come in all sorts of forms. It might be emotional support. It might be someone taking care of the cooking or the housework so that you can focus on work. It could have a direct relation to your work – either by delegating tasks which don’t use your skills to the full, or by getting advice on an area which you’re struggling with on your own. 2. Rest More I’m always a bit iffy about stories of people functioning on three hours sleep while they build their business empire. Sure, they might achieve something great – but I always wonder if they’d have done even better with a full night’s rest. If you’re doing anything remotely creative or which requires concentration, you’re not going to be at anywhere near 100% if you’re not resting enough. That doesn’t just mean getting a good night’s sleep – it also means taking time off to relax and play. This isn’t “wasting” time – it’s ensuring that you can be on top form during your working hours. 3. First Things First “First Things First” is one of Stephen Covey’s “7 Habits” in 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. It means taking care of the most important things in your life before turning to the rest. If you tend to prioritize by urgency – dealing with whatever comes in by email or by phone – then find a way to structure your day so that your important work gets done first. It’s amazing how much you can accomplish in a single focused hour at the start of the workday, when you’re feeling fresh and motivated. 4. Limit Your Goals Of course, if you’re going to put first things first, that means knowing what’s really important. Chasing multiple goals at once isn’t usually a good strategy. You might be able to manage it if your goals support one another (e.g. “eat more healthily” might give you the energy for “launch my business”), but having lots of goals generally diffuses your attention. Rather than trying to do everything at once, pick one or two key goals for each year, and focus wholeheartedly on those. It’s much better to actually accomplish a dream than to have a vague stab at lots of different things … only to end up making very little progress. Read more at http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/why-you-should-work-smart-not-hard-4-ways-to-do-it/#iYdXqT5qfBUTyszQ.99