There is no such thing as tough. There is trained and untrained. Now which are you? — Creasy, from the movie: Man on Fire Everyone, once we reach a certain age, learns that life is going to be hard at times. For some, hard times are the norm. We all cope with difficulties in different ways. Most of us hope, when hard times come, we will be tough enough to weather the storms. I want to suggest that that is not a very good plan! There is nothing wrong with developing a certain “toughness” to your character. I am a Dad of two boys and I want my sons to be emotionally “tough” enough to pick themselves up, brush themselves off and get back in the game after they’ve been tackled. Continuing with the metaphor, life is going to tackle you from time to time. Things will happen that will knock you down. A loved one may die, you may lose a job, a relationship may end. These are significant, painful, and life-changing events that are just part of life and we need to have the strength, the “toughness” to overcome them and move on with our lives as best we can. There is, however, an important difference between being “tough” and being “trained.” Training has a specific objective, a goal, a purpose. You can easily recognize the difference between people at the gym who are just there to exercise and those who are training for something. They are not there just to get tough–though that is part of the training. They are there to do very specific exercises to strengthen specific parts of their bodies so that they can compete in a specific event. Training is done with an end in mind. I’ll ask you this question: “What are you training for?” If the storms of life blow you off track, you may be tough enough to get back up, but, if you are untrained, you’ll be getting up to start over wherever you landed. You didn’t really get blown off track because you were not really on a track in the first place. However, if you are training your life with a specific goal in mind, you will not only be tough enough to get back up, you will also know how to get back on track because you were headed in a specific direction. You will be able to get your bearings and figure out what you need to do to start your life back in the direction you were headed. Have a plan for your life and be training for it! Don’t settle for just hoping to be tough enough to survive whatever come your way. You see, life requires that you be tough. Be tough and trained, rather than tough and untrained!